Engagement Gift Etiquette

When someone close to you like a friend or relative becomes engaged it is a time to congratulate and celebrate to happy news. Most of us know the etiquette when buying wedding presents but what about engagement gift etiquette? By knowing what is expected you can prevent people being offended or going overboard, avoiding a potentially embarrassing event. Especially with engagement parties becoming more popular, this situation has become more common. Don't worry you are not alone. Getting engagement gifts can be tricky and this article should help clear up any misconceptions.

Do I Need to Send a Gift?

Although you are not required to give an engagement gift, it is appropriate and a thoughtful gesture to send a congratulatory note to the couple. However, sending a gift is often a nice gesture to wish the best for the soon-to-be married couple. Having said that, do not feel obligated to send a present if you are not a close friend or the relation too distant. A card should be enough for even the most distant relationship.

If you are closer to one side of the couple it is acceptable to only send a present to one half of the couple. However be tactful about it to avoid the risk of offending the other party.

What to get

Gifts should not be expensive as they are not married yet, and people tend to send a wedding present anyway. A meaningful present to honour the relationship will be better received. Remember these are still two separate individuals and during an engagement they have only announced an intention to become one. For that reason you should get a gift that reflects that.

Instead of giving an engagement gift for the house such as towels or dishes, give them something they both can enjoy together or separately. For example, spa treatments and gift certificates are popular. This is something they both can do together as individuals.

Weddings are very expensive and if you want to present a gesture but don't have time to buy a gift, a gift of money will always be welcome.

The Couple

When sending out engagement invitations or announcements, the etiquette is not to send any gift request or registry information. This is just an announcement of your intention to marry. Also do not expect gifts from anyone except the closest of friends and family. Most people have to shell out for transport to your wedding and other costs such as clothes and a wedding present and so it is reasonable for them to want to save some money.

If you do receive gifts, place them aside and thank the giver tactfully. Do not open presents during the party if you have one as you won't want anybody not giving gifts feel guilty. If they insist, open them away from the centre of the party and other guests.

After the party, open the presents and make a list of who has given what. Spend some time to hand write a thank you note showing your appreciation. This should be sent on behalf of you and your fianc矇. Send these out within a week as any longer and people may wonder whether you opened their presents. It is also not appropriate to send a digital thank you note only.

Although you don't want to think negatively, some engagements don't conclude with a marriage. In that case all engagement presents received should be sent back.

Congratulations

Engagement gift etiquette can be confusing so just remember, if you do wish to send an engagement gift to the happy couple, keep it modest and small as a gesture to their happiness. And save up money for the actual wedding presents instead!